Identity Theft

I am discovering a new kind of Christianity through a radical Jesus, in his flawless character and unequivocal love. I thought I had a grip on the essence of the Savior and am realizing more everyday that I have barely even scratched the surface.

"Whoever shall lose his life for my sake shall gain it." (Matt. 10:39) I had always believed this statement to be true, knowing that by forsaking my worldly possessions I would find a profound freedom in the reality of Christ. But it has recently occurred to me that by LIFE, perhaps Jesus meant identity or ego? We have the tendency to view this command solely in practical terms: houses, money, careers, etc. But what about the inner work? What about all the boxes and labels that have shaped who we are? How do we define ourselves?

I can't help but wonder if Jesus is really asking for ALL of us, comprising all that is internal. In fact, this is the part we as humans find most difficult to abandon. We will appear weak, vulnerable, insignificant. No one will approve of us in this way! It is embedded deep in our human condition to desire acceptance and to feel valued, which we seek from other people. Why is it so difficult for us to be content exclusively with God's acceptance of us?

Many questions swim through my mind as I ponder these notions: Does this speak of little faith in the Almighty if we need assurance from people? Is there a balance of love from God and love from our neighbor? What does it look like to release something so intangible to Him?

Yet I believe this is what Jesus is requesting - no, commanding - us to sacrifice: our self-centered ego. To give up all of us - everything we know and hold onto, including how we define ourselves - for His purposes, His desires. To constantly take the back seat and be last in everything, all out of love. Perhaps that is how we shall find freedom. To claim our label as "follower of Christ" instead of by what we do or achieve. For all of that is His too. And as we slowly loosen the tight grip we have on our lives and hand them over to Him, only then will we begin to see that a life in the Father is far greater than any label or box could ever define.